How to Enjoy Your Wedding Day (Even if You Hate Being the Centre of Attention)

Not everyone dreams of being centre stage

Let’s be honest — not every couple wants all eyes on them. Some love the idea of walking down the aisle to applause, making a big speech, or spinning around the dance floor… but for others, it feels a bit overwhelming.

If you’re the type who shudders at the thought of being the centre of attention, please know this: your wedding day doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. You can still have a ceremony that’s full of love, joy, and meaning — without any moments that make you feel uncomfortable.

As a North Yorkshire wedding celebrant, I spend time really getting to know you — your personalities, your worries, and your hopes for the day. That way, we can shape a ceremony that feels relaxed, personal, and true to you, with no pressure to do anything that doesn’t sit right.

So, what can you do instead of the “traditional” wedding elements? Let’s explore some ideas…

If walking down the aisle feels daunting

For some, the thought of walking down the aisle with everyone staring is nerve-racking. Instead, why not:

• Walk in together as a couple — a lovely symbol of starting this next chapter side by side.

• Be already at the front when your guests arrive, greeting them casually before the ceremony begins.

• Walk in with a group — siblings, children, friends, or even your dog (yes, really!) can come in with you, so the spotlight isn’t only on you.

If you’d rather not read aloud

Not everyone enjoys speaking in public, and that’s okay. Alternatives include:

• Private vow exchange — share your words with each other quietly before or after the ceremony.

• Ask me, your celebrant, to read them for you — I can weave your words into the story of your ceremony so they’re still heard and celebrated, without you standing up to read.

• Choose symbolic gestures instead — like a handfasting, a ring exchange, or lighting a candle, to represent your promises without needing to say them aloud.

If the idea of a top table makes you squirm

Not keen on sitting at a table with everyone watching while you eat? You’re not alone! Why not try:

• Long banquet-style tables where you sit among your guests.

• Mix and mingle dining with food trucks, sharing platters, or relaxed grazing tables.

• Your own little sweetheart table — just the two of you, tucked in a corner so you can enjoy a quiet moment together.

If the first dance isn’t your thing

The first dance can feel like an awkward spotlight moment. Alternatives?

• Invite everyone onto the dance floor straight away so you’re surrounded and not singled out.

• Choose a group activity instead — like a ceilidh, a quiz, or a sparkler send-off to kick off the evening.

• Skip it altogether (I did!) — your wedding, your rules.

Your wedding, your way

The beauty of a celebrant-led ceremony is that there are no rules. I’ll take the time to listen to what makes you feel anxious, and together we’ll create a ceremony where you feel relaxed, present, and happy. Whether that means walking in with your dog, skipping speeches, or having no “big moments” at all, it will still be deeply meaningful, romantic, and totally yours. Because at the end of the day, your wedding isn’t a performance. It’s a celebration of your love. And that’s more than enough.

Get in Touch

If this sounds like the kind of ceremony you’d love, let’s chat. I’d be delighted to hear your ideas (and worries!) and help you shape a wedding day that feels natural, personal, and perfectly you. You can book a no-obligation call with me here.

Let's connect FACEBOOK INSTAGRAM